For The Rescue Of Us All

I am calm. Cool and collected.

I've been thinking about the vastness of marriage lately and what "getting married" really means. Is it simply "I do" or is it more "I know I will"? Is it more "I love you so much right now" or "I am certain I will love more and more every day."?

Wedding plan is amazing. I'm L-O-V-I-N-G it. Not so much for the preparations of the wedding day, but more how planning the details have continually reminded me and brought me back to a central place of hope and calm, and rembrance of why Jason and I have made it here, and will make it there.

Questions like "what type of flowers do you want" and "what songs are being played" and "what type of electric knife do you want to register for" all bring back to memories of our relationship and little pieces of Jason that I have thoroughly fallen in love with. Memories of yellow lilies when I was sick, and the many dances we have shared, trying to cook pupusas, and jumping over rain puddles. Listening to "our songs" again to pick just the right ones for the wedding, and revisiting our parent's history to incorporate their traditions of love and marriage, and making sure our wedding day is an almagamation of all the little memories of pieces of ourselves incorporated into one big party has been the greatest joy and challenge to date.